a timely smile

oh, elijah grey.

i've been so frail of mind and body these last few days.

feels like you haven't even noticed.

at first this frustrated me.

yesterday i even said to you,

"can you please just slow the heck down? mama has a sinus infection, i need you to relax!"

and you answered me with nothing more than more merry jumping and shouting.

and i may have pretended that your climbing on my back was a massage.

because it almost felt like one.

i cried as i sat with you at lunch.

my heart was sad that i wasn't being very much fun.

you were so cute! telling me something important about your care bear. i think.

i was irritated at my headache, and desperate for a nap.

i told you i was sorry for being grumpy and asked you to forgive me.

sometimes i wonder if you understand anything i say, because you seem so focused on another thing.

yesterday, you knew exactly what i needed.

we both needed to smile.

and there isn't much that spreads a smile so wide as that, your favorite goofy grin.

i don't remember when you started making this hilarious face, but i am so glad it's here.

thanks for letting me capture our favorite smile on camera.

i know it's difficult for you to look at me sometimes, so this was solid gold.

thanks for sharing your sweetness.

elijah, all these things papa and mama are trying to learn about you?

you are teaching us most of it.

and we want to know more.

be patient with us?

we adore you, little one!