Friday, January 20, 2012

when life gives you gators {make gatorade}

my sister says that. it makes me smile.

we enjoyed some sweet time together with patrick during his time off from work.
we also had some tiring times. i mean, everything can't be "fun" all.the.time.
we had appointments to get to, dangerous temperatures keeping us otherwise indoors, laundry to do, etc.
really, i think we did a fine job of making our days as fun as they could be, now that i think about it.

i've also been thinking about how far i've come since this time five years ago.
i'm peaceful, hurting less. joyful more. i'm a mama-my heart is full with the beauty of this gift.
sometimes, i believe it's good to think on old trials. those discomforts and great pains of the past.
they help me have a clearer view of grace. they make me grateful. for the getting through them. for the one who carried me each step of the way. i'm never alone. i'm never alone. i'm never alone.
do you ever chant such things to yourself? i do. i need to, because there's usually a mighty loud voice inside of me that is roaring the exact opposite of whatever i'm chanting.
right now i'm chanting these verses:

Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without price. Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy? Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good, and delight yourselves in rich food. Incline your ear, and come to me; hear, that your soul may live; and I will make with you an everlasting covenant, my steadfast, sure love for David.
{isaiah 55:1-3esv}

i'm memorizing this with this group on angel's blog.
i've learned it before, as a little kid and in the king james version. it's been on my heart a lot lately,
so i decided i wanted a fresh look at it and to commit it again to my memory.
god's nourishment lasts. it's eternal and it feeds my soul.
he calls me to "come, buy and eat" and without cost! it's free. for me, from him.
a gift, his grace, mercy, strength, power, endurance, forgiveness.
his "food" satisfies! listening to him, delighting myself in him, soaking up his word. that's how i get this freely offered nourishment. this that sustains me more than any feast. i've been starving myself by mixing up my focus. do you know what that's like? to get obsessed with the thing or the problem.

sometimes life is just hard. and sometimes i just wear that difficulty. it's strapped to my back, i lug it around all day, broken and sweaty from the burden. exhausted from carrying it all alone. oh. wait, i am never alone.
"lord, please help, lord, send me strength to carry this burden all by myself"
that is practically what i have prayed before. so holy, so right.
no. sadly, i too often get all wacky like that and mix up myself with my life giver.
you know what that chapter says in a few verses down?

Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts
.
{isaiah 55:6-9esv}

he pardons me, abundantly. my little finite self. when i try to take on the burden alone, figure out the trouble, twist it all into what makes sense. he forgives. his thoughts are higher, his ways are higher.
i just need to call to him, and he will help me to trust him.
so, these tough spots, these troubles that come my way, i give them all back to him.
they are his plans. his purposes will be fulfilled.
today i praise him for grace for my thick head,
when i am so foolish to try and understand what he's up to in my wonderful, colorful life.
pray for me. pray that i would trust him.

how can i pray for you this weekend?

13 comments:

  1. What a beautiful passage. I am so glad you are memorizing it. Beautiful.

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  2. He heals that which is broken... we are so undeserving.

    You sure can pray for my big boy's lung to seal up good as new over the next few days. It won't hurt my feelings a bit if you do.

    God is good, all the time!

    xxoo

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  3. Beautiful words. Thanks, as always, for sharing them.

    You could pray for my middle boy, Carson. He's being baptized on Sunday. (yay!) He's so shy and I don't want his nervousness and fear at being in front of a bunch of people to get the better of him. So far, he's not a bit nervous, which is weird except it's not because of course God's bigger than that. So I'm praying it stays that way. That he'll focused on what he's doing & why. Thanks, Hannah!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

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  4. that's an awesome scripture! I love this post... reminds me of By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North.

    happy weekend Hannah!

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  5. Thank you for reminding me that His food satisfies. I have a thick head, too. I forget. Have a good weekend, friend. :)

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  6. Never hear that saying before but i'm loving it. That scripture speaks to me in leaps and bounds right now thanks for being transparent.

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  7. truly beautiful...thank you for the reminder. and yes, i will be praying for you.

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  8. Hannah....I really really love this.

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  9. Praying for you, friend--can you just keep praying I follow my heart? It looks like I will take a year leave as long as my son's doctor writes up his diagnosis...that feels "safer" than resigning--but wither way, I will finish this year and see what doors open down the road. I plan on enjoying these mothering years and having faith it will all work out. Have a great weekend!

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  10. Been meaning to tell ya just how much I love your new blog look! So pretty and uptown looking :) What I love even more is how your words always manage to speak straight to my heart and resonate with whatever struggle I'm currently experiencing. Thank you for always inspiring me with your divine timing!

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  11. i love your blog...i am a new follower...so yay for that.

    and i would love for you to pray for my dad this weekeend, there is more about him over on my blog. really my parents, thank you and i so needed to read this today.

    love,
    jessica
    www.morrisonlane.blogspot.com

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  12. Oh Hannah! I just love you girl! You bless my heart so. Your encouraging words fill my empty.
    xoxo
    Andee

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  13. that i may see more color and less stress this weekend. more hope and joy and faith, and less worries about bills, bills, bills. :) thanks.

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