Monday, September 12, 2011

a full heart

time waits for no man.
this little six month old is now approaching his third birthday. say what?!

i've been thinking lately.

three years ago i sat in a cramped exam room with elijah's birth mother.
we heard elijah's heartbeat.
praise jesus.

i didn't know his name. i didn't even know he was a he.
i just knew, that little heartbeat belonged to our child.

processing this over these last few years has been an amazing experience.
honestly, i've wrestled to understand it sometimes.
then i realize, i probably never will. but god does.
and some things are just fine, being mysteries to me.

The Lord looks down from heaven
and sees the whole human race.
From his throne he observes
all who live on the earth.
He made their hearts,
so he understands everything they do.
psalm 33:13-15nlt

i'm certain that i will just never fully understand what it was like for elijah's birth mother.
she seemed so certain. about me and patrick, becoming the parents of her child.
she seemed so pleased, joyful even, to give us her baby.
if there was one thing i could tell her right this instant, it'd be that we love her so much.
our hearts are brimming with it. love. for her.

the decision she made changed her life forever.
just like it changed ours.
we live different lives, ours with elijah, hers without.

i think about her. all the time.

when i race elijah up a clover covered hill.
when i fix up his scrapes.
when i bathe him, and scrub the dirt from his little boy body.
reading, in the quiet of the night, his sweet hands flipping the pages.

i think of her,
the woman who carried him,
who birthed him into this world.
the woman who gave us this darling boy.
prayers are said for her. hugs are sent to her.

can she feel them?
i just want her to know!!

we are grateful. we love her. we pray for her.
and elijah will always know that she is the very best gift giver that our family has ever known.
god used her, in an incredible way, to make our lives lovely.

Praise him for his mighty works;
praise his unequaled greatness!
psalm 150:2nlt

my heart is also full today for the burkleos!!
i've mentioned before, but i'll remind y'all:
my friend danielle and her family are adopting!
a fun part of this for you is that you can help them raise some cash loots.

she is hosting a fabulous giveaway!
click on this sweet love button below,
check out the loads of goodies you can win by helping them with a donation:

one sweet love

linking up with heather, because adoption is just about the loveliest thing i know of.


  1. What a beautiful post on adoption. It's something that hasn't really been in my life so I've enjoyed discovering about people's journeys that involve adoption. Have a great week.

  2. Elijah, is precious and you're right... it is a mystery.
    I adore how you love and pray for the birth mother. You're one amazing lady and I love your last line "because adoption is just about the loveliest thing i know of." :)

  3. beautiful. God is so good with the mysteries.

  4. What a cutie pie! It is a wonder how time flies!
    I don't recall if I ever told you this or not? While adoption is not a part of our immediate family...we do have some very dear friends from church who are in the final stages of the l.o.n.g. process of bringing their little girl & boy home from Haiti. Thank you for helping me think about things in new ways so I can befriend her with a greater understanding!
    God Bless!

  5. What a fantastic post! My Patrick and I are praying about adoption - thank you for sharing!

  6. Such a sweet, beautiful post. Kevin and I talk about adopting often. We'll see what God has in store for us. Your love for the birth mother speaks volumes about you.

  7. I'll head over to your friends blog right away. :0)
    You guys are so full of love for Elijah. It's beautiful to see. His birth mom must've known she had a fabulous family in you guys!! Do you keep in touch?

    Time flies by when you have kids. It is sooooo bittersweet. I am right there with you. God is so good.

  8. What a sweet boy! I think about our birthmother all the time, too. I wonder how much she wants to know, or if she'd rather not. I can't imagine what it must be like. You are such an encourager, friend!

  9. what a sweet post. i can't say it enough, love your heart :) how blessed elijah is to have you as his mama.

  10. What a beautiful tribute this is to his birth mother-and to you! Love the way you pray for her and celebrate her gift to your family.

  11. Oh gosh. I love this and the heart you have for Elijah's birth mom. I have no idea what it must be like to be in her shoes. Bless your little 3 year old gift!

  12. Now I am sitting in Starbucks with tears in my eyes. This is one of the most touching posts I have read in a long time. I do believe that your son is just as lucky to have you as you are to have him.

  13. Crazy how God choose you guys to be his parents. Way long ago. You were always his parents. And so thankful for birth moms and dads who are willing to adopt out for a better life for their child. A beautiful sacrifice.

  14. that top picture just makes me melt.
    look at those chubby chipmunk cheeks.

    your little (biggie) dude is too much.

    such a blessing.

    praise the lord.

    and praying for birth mama as well. :) what an incredible gift!

  15. so who's lovely? your bloggy!
    congrats from me to you!

  16. I found your blog through my good friend, Janna, at Diamonds and Dandelions. Loved your post! What a sweet story!

  17. i read this yesterday on my phone and have been thinking about it ever since. it's one of my favorite posts of yours ever. and that's saying lots. i love your story.

  18. Wow! Great story. It's a reminder of the miracles that happen in spite of the limited cirucmstances we may see in front of us. I love hearing stories of God's blessings bestowed upon families, and the fact that you express so much gratitude and love to the birth mother is inspiring and downright touching.

  19. This is such a beautiful post. It brought tears to my eyes.

  20. "some things are just fine, being mysteries to me." i've learned (the hard way) to embrace the Mystery. ironically God becomes bigger when i do.

    11 years ago today we had a son born into heaven. i don't know the why, but i know the Mystery, and i trust Him.

    and hannah, you should go back and read your post as if God is the birth mother. that is how the Spirit lead me to read it...
    God- pleased, joyful to give me His son, Jesus.
    the decision God made changed our lives forever... we live different lives, ours with Jesus, His without.
    I think of Him, God, Who birthed Jesus into this world...I am grateful. I love Him.

    your words speaking so much more than i think you intended. the Spirit speaking so much more through you.

    May God bless your friends with the child He has planned for them, and may god be glorified.

    see you next week!!

  21. I love this post! I feel the same way about Max's birthmom!

  22. My word. Tears. I can't even imagine. You are so sweet to think of and pray for her. What an amzing story this is! Bless her heart too. I can't imagine the feeling of 'giving up' your child. But, she couldn't have picked a better heart.